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Topic: Length.. - part 28

esebulldog

Mon 05/25/15 05:48 AM

wishing a happy and safe memorial day to all the lengthy mingletards

rude joke of the day...
I got a phone call from a gorgeous ex-girlfriend of mine the other day. We lost track of time, chatting about the wild nights we used to enjoy together. I couldn’t believe it when she asked if I’d like to meet up and maybe rekindle a little of that magic. "Wow!", I said, "I don’t know if I could keep pace with you now! I’m a bit older and a bit balder than when you last saw me!" She giggled and said she was sure I’d meet the challenge! "Yeah", I said, "just so long as you don’t mind a man with a waistband that’s a few inches wider these days!" She laughed and told me to stop being so silly! She teased me, saying that she thought tubby bald men were cute! "Anyway, I’ve put on a couple of pounds myself!" she giggled .....so I told her to flock off.

esebulldog

Mon 06/01/15 04:29 PM

rude joke of the day...
One day, a man walked into a dentist office and asked how much it would cost to extract a wisdom tooth.
"Forty" the dentist said.
"That's a ridiculous amount," the man said. "Isn't there a cheaper way?"
"Well," the dentist said, "if you don't use an anaesthetic, I can knock the price down to thirty."
Looking annoyed, the man said, "That's still far too expensive!"
"Okay," said the dentist. "If I save on time and simply rip the tooth out with a pair of pliers, I can knock the price down to ten."
"Nope," moaned the man, "it's still too much."
"Well," said the dentist finally, scratching his head, "if I let one of my students do it using pliers, I suppose I can knock the price down to five."
"Marvelous!" said the man. "Book my wife in for next Tuesday!"

esebulldog

Mon 06/01/15 08:16 PM

Bikers may have a tough reputation, but what these guys did for a child who was bullied was simply sweet.

A 5-year-old girl from Albuquerque, New Mexico, whose identity has not been revealed, was reportedly assaulted on the way back from school. After being told about the incident, the Punishers, a motorcycle club, surprised the girl who has a mental disability late last month in an effort to make her feel empowered, according to KRQE.

“We rounded up all the bikes and we rode over to the little girl’s house and said 'hi,'” Aaron Holmes, a member of the Punishers, told KRQE of the interaction.

The motorcycle group, whose members include those in law enforcement, EMS personnel and firefighters, were asked to speak to the girl, who had been jumped by some neighborhood kids and beaten up, according to the outlet. They teamed up with local defense group Shockwave to surprise the 5-year-old. When they showed up to her house, they assured her that they'd have her back.

“We told her that we are always there for her no matter what,” Norman Gonzalez, president of the Albuquerque chapter of the Punishers, told KRQE.

Sometimes, bullying victims get the last laugh. Last year, a middle school cheerleader Desiree Andrews who has Down syndrome, was bullied by some people in the stands. The basketball players decided to stick up for her, and walked off the court during a time out to address the bullies, Kenosha News reported.

In another show of moving support, a prom queen came to the rescue of her friend that was bullied. Last fall, Lillian Skinner, who was a student at a North Texas high school, was bullied and told she had been nominated for homecoming court even though she hadn't been. So her friend, Anahi Alvarez, who had been named homecoming queen, gave Skinner the crown, local news station KTVT reported.