Topic: I love the girl in office ... which has a boyfriend :( pls.
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Michael_Luxor

Sat 08/20/16 03:37 PM

Good night all.

In early February of this year to our department came the girl (she is 22, I'm 24). But the direction of the work we have been a little different. I not really notice it as something not soared. Disposition in our building so that each cabinet is divided into two halves, each - 2 employee. I sat with my colleague in one part of the study, this girl - on the other side (like its brand new - taught). But in April, my colleague resigned, and the girl was transferred to my site to me. She was accustomed to the team, and with the direction of the work. Together we learn something new, help and support each other. I began to notice that she was beginning to like me, somehow unconsciously. Now we just sit at a distance of 10 centimeters from each other, making fun of each other (sometimes that rzhem, little if not in golosinu: D). Do compliment her, gently, very gently touched her arms or shoulder. I think she does not mind such touching. It also happens that it holds or touches my hand, as it were, by accident. I offer her after work to drive her home, the girl agrees. And everything would be fine and well .... BUT .... she rents an apartment with her boyfriend .... in the house, to which I am bringing it every day.(((
I could't understand myself that it felt. And perhaps even now not fully understand. Understand that she loves another, and lives with him, but at the same time feel to it very, very tender feelings, to look at it eyes - it's not easy. She meets with him about 3 years; maybe I just do not have enough confidence in your feelings, whether they are sincere. Still, this guy three years behind with it. And what I have with her now, a couple of months?
Can you give me advice? What I need to do? How to pull "myself" together? In what direction to go? Thank you...
P.S. English is not my native language. So, do not be angry ;)
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SassyEuro2

Sat 08/20/16 03:52 PM

It sounds like.. you are just wishing for a relationship with her.

And that the only real relationship is what she has or had with him.

There is nothing you can do, or say to change it.

Just move on
Edited by SassyEuro2 on Sat 08/20/16 03:53 PM
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searay260

Mon 08/22/16 12:15 AM


It sounds like.. you are just wishing for a relationship with her.

And that the only real relationship is what she has or had with him.

There is nothing you can do, or say to change it.

Just move on


I agree Sassy, and may I add that you are being paid to work and act professional while at work. If you keep this infatuation going it will eventually affect your job performance as your mind will be elsewhere. An act of kindness to offer a co-worker a ride home is just that, an act of kindness, just because she accepts doesn't mean that she wants to date you.
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Unknow

Mon 08/22/16 12:20 AM

Your co-worker is unavailable for a relationship... Concentrate on someone who IS...

Best Wishes...
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realcarebear

Mon 08/22/16 12:35 AM


Your co-worker is unavailable for a relationship... Concentrate on someone who IS...

Best Wishes...



Yes and honestly I'd stop all the touching and taking her home. Let her boyfriend do that.
Michael_Luxor's photo

Michael_Luxor

Mon 08/22/16 10:56 AM

Thank you for advice, people. May be is really not my chance with her)
I like her. She is attractive, she is wonderful. But not my girl, right :(. And I don't want destroy her happiness, really.
Thx)
Edited by Michael_Luxor on Mon 08/22/16 11:02 AM
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soufiehere

Mon 08/22/16 11:03 AM


Thank you for advice, people. May be is really not my chance with her)
I like her. She is attractive, she is wonderful. But not my girl, right :(. And I don't want to destroy not mine happiness, and her happiness, really.
Thx)


You will find, as you get older, that you actually
can look down the road at a potential relationship
and see the pitfalls and work them out in your
own mind before you take precipitate action.

You are in the danger zone.
Be wise.
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unknown_romeo

Mon 08/22/16 11:04 AM

My advice to you....never mess with a chick that's in a relationship or married or whatever...even if her relationship isn't going well stay away from those thoughts & plans.
I know there are jackazzes that do mess with chicks that are taken but i personally don't believe in such shiit & i would never advise it.
Forget her & trying to 'get with her' & stuff
BreakingGood's photo

BreakingGood

Mon 08/22/16 02:03 PM

I didn't feel like reading more then the first sentence. So I didn't.

But, if you want a girl that is with someone else then you befriend her.

Compliment her but DON'T kiss her butt too much.

Soon or later, she will complain about her BF. They ALL do. You simple say your special and deserve better.

Just hang in there until he does something really stupid. Guys ALWAYS do something stupid.

Then you comfort her and say you would never do that to her.

Again, tell her she is special and should be treated with respect.

When she says her BF is an ahole for this or that. Just give here a look of agreement but don't say anything. PRETEND your not making her BF look bad.

All the while, try to take her to lunch. Buy her inexpensive fun stuff if the situation presents itself.

Soon or later, she will crumble. You will have her as long as other guys aren't doing the same thing.

I'm not going to post an entire playbook here but that should get what you want using the above guide.

Good Luck and enjoy. No charge.
Edited by BreakingGood on Mon 08/22/16 02:05 PM
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SassyEuro2

Mon 08/22/16 03:46 PM


I didn't feel like reading more then the first sentence. So I didn't.

But, if you want a girl that is with someone else then you befriend her.

Compliment her but DON'T kiss her butt too much.

Soon or later, she will complain about her BF. They ALL do. You simple say your special and deserve better.

Just hang in there until he does something really stupid. Guys ALWAYS do something stupid.

Then you comfort her and say you would never do that to her.

Again, tell her she is special and should be treated with respect.

When she says her BF is an ahole for this or that. Just give here a look of agreement but don't say anything. PRETEND your not making her BF look bad.

All the while, try to take her to lunch. Buy her inexpensive fun stuff if the situation presents itself.

Soon or later, she will crumble. You will have her as long as other guys aren't doing the same thing.

I'm not going to post an entire playbook here but that should get what you want using the above guide.

Good Luck and enjoy. No charge.


whoa Providing she is a bimbo

Or her man doesn't accidentally run him over in the parking lot.

Or thr boss doesn't fire him for sh*ttng where he eats.
BreakingGood's photo

BreakingGood

Mon 08/22/16 04:06 PM


whoa Providing she is a bimbo

Or her man doesn't accidentally run him over in the parking lot.

Or thr boss doesn't fire him for sh*ttng where he eats.

laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh

OP appears to be young. So to the girl must be.

Experienced women can spot the game a mile away.

But, some of us, can play the game very well. BTW you are very special. laugh
Edited by BreakingGood on Mon 08/22/16 04:08 PM
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JOHNN111

Mon 08/22/16 04:58 PM

Never go fishing off the company dock smokin
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realcarebear

Mon 08/22/16 05:14 PM

Never get your honey where ya make your money!smokin
sybariticguy's photo

sybariticguy

Mon 08/22/16 05:32 PM

don't stick your pen in company ink....
sybariticguy's photo

sybariticguy

Mon 08/22/16 05:32 PM

don't stick your pen in company ink....
adivorcedone's photo

adivorcedone

Mon 08/22/16 05:52 PM

Office romances never really work out...and top management frown on such relationships......and when it ends, and it will end....the awkwardness sets in....so some one has to quit that job....Are you prepared for this outcome......????
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RebelArcher

Mon 08/22/16 06:03 PM

The whole "don't date where you work" thing is cool and all....but how 'bout don't frick around with another person's bf or gf.