Topic: prentending to be happy even though youre not
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tessy14

Sun 09/25/16 09:41 AM

deep sigghhhhhhh. :persevere:
JamieRawxx's photo

JamieRawxx

Sun 09/25/16 09:56 AM

That's why I don't. Leave unhappy situations.
Rooster35's photo

Rooster35

Sun 09/25/16 10:41 AM

Why pretend? Isn't being genuine more important and honest?
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sparkyae5

Sun 09/25/16 11:27 AM


deep sigghhhhhhh. :persevere:


WOMEN ARE THE MASTERS AT DOING THAT.....WOMEN HAVE BEEN THE GIVERS AND MEN HAVE

BEEN THE TAKERS........
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Scarecrow060972

Sun 09/25/16 11:46 AM

I do it all the time. If I believe it, I can achieve it, so no matter what's going on behind the scenes, I usually appear to be in a pretty good mood. My hateful cat, though, he gets to hear it ALL, LOL
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butribu

Sun 09/25/16 11:47 AM

i do it a lot and perfectly well!!
no one will ever understand my sadness from my behaviours. no hint.
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butribu

Sun 09/25/16 11:48 AM


My hateful cat, though, he gets to hear it ALL, LOL


the same here ! lol
SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo

SparklingCrystal 💖💎

Sun 09/25/16 01:53 PM

I'm not sure I do that or am good at it for that matter. I don't like pretending to begin with, way too straightforward for that.

As for other, there's not much to pretend, I usually see right through it. It's all in the eyes. That's why when looking at piccies on a dating site 99% of them make me feel like "Next!!!"
Eyes don't lie. Also one of the reasons why I don't like doing photo (energy) readings. All I see in 99.999% of ppl is deep sadness.
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SimpyComplicated

Sun 09/25/16 03:11 PM

While happiness can be a choice.

Denying unhappiness is not choosing happiness
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SimpyComplicated

Sun 09/25/16 03:22 PM

Choosing to be happy in adverse situations can give you strength to make further choices to create future happiness.

You are the creator of the way you experience life.

Enjoy the frustrations of learning how:upside_down:
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tmh1063

Sun 09/25/16 04:15 PM



deep sigghhhhhhh. :persevere:


I think pretending is more common then most people think. Because our environment is geared on " being happy" if your not, there is something wrong with you and the doctor is quick to prescript some happy pills.

We turn on the T.V and most everyone is beautiful and if we are somehow not, were not happy about that. Every 3rd or so commercial is from the pharmaceutical industry pushing yet another pill., face cream or weight loss miracle.

I think many times there are very valid reasons for not being happy, and it is o.k... it is normal.. not abnormal. Just as it is normal to be happy.




I totally agree. Society seems to think that sadness is a sign of weakness for some reason. That's why I try to remain positive at work at least around people I am not as close to. It seems that we have to appear happy in order to be pc. If we were all completely honest about our feeling though, NOBODY is happy all the time. Those who pretend they are, are really good actors. It is completely normal to have good days and bad days. It is also normal to go through periods where we are down. There's nothing wrong with it. It's normal. However if it is a depression that you can't snap out of and you suspect you may be clinically depressed, then you may want to reach out for advice from your doctor or a support group.
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peggy122

Sun 09/25/16 04:33 PM

I personally dont think there is anything wrong with pretending to be happy in public under certain circumstances . I don't see why all my relatives, my colleagues or clients at work, should be penalised because of my unhappiness if it's not their fault.

Thankfully I have a couple of relatives and handful of friends who allow me to vent privately , and Im comfortable being honest with them, To everyone else , I just say vague things like Im coping or Im grateful for my blessings and paste a smile on..

But I never lie to myself about being unhappy. I allow myself to wallow in misery on my own for as long as I need to .

It's just for a season. The feeling always passes.
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SitkaRains

Sun 09/25/16 04:35 PM


deep sigghhhhhhh. :persevere:

I look at this a bit different. I guess. To me my happiness is a choice thing. Yes, I can have off days or be in situations that brings sadness, anger etc. and yet if asked I would answer truthfully I am happy...

When I am in a situation that is draining me I take a step back and evaluate what I am doing to cause "my unhappiness" then I change my thought process and my actions.

If we are talking about in a relationship.. If I know that it will lead to my devaluing who I am and will bring me down then I am backing off.

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ciretom

Sun 09/25/16 05:10 PM

prentending to be happy even though youre not

is extremely draining, and the more you do it the more you will get sucked into a self destructive spiral.

Unfortunately I think about 99% of any job that interacts with customers or the public demand it.

Unfortunately, parents tend to suck and crappily teach their kids it's better to sacrifice for the benefit of another, to help with their burden while trying to avoid being one to others.
"Stop crying, you have to share, don't act up or you don't get to go, be nice, be good, be respectful of others."

Unfortunately, most of life teaches you to be a punching bag too.
"Don't fight just walk away, if someone hits you your life is full of police and paperwork unless you just take it, if you hit someone your life is full of police and paperwork and jail and you don't get a choice, no one cares about your problems everyone has their own problems, be a friend and maybe someone will be yours, hope for the best prepare for the worst."



The only hope you have is when you become an adult you can go out and build your own family. You can find friends and date and find specific people where when you're around them you never have to pretend to be happy when you're not, you can simply feel how you naturally feel, you can speak your mind, and you can make that family where you spend most of your time and energy with.
That's your choice. Lots of hard work, though.

But the rest of the time?
Civilization. Civilization = suck it up to get along. There will be reciprocation. It's in the social contract. The more you push your problems on others, the more they'll push theirs on you. And there is a lot more of "them" than there are of "you." So suck it up, pretend happiness, escape to the family you build. The only place you can truly be yourself.

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Snoman1951

Sun 09/25/16 05:48 PM

If I'm on this side of the dirt, I'm a happy camper! Some say I can be a miserable SOB...if ya don't wanna get stung, don't jam a stick in a hornets nest happy
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Unknow

Sun 09/25/16 07:49 PM

Every day I pretend to be happy because I have to greet customers at my job while answering their questions and then clean up after them when they leave. It always amazes me how many truly hateful people there are out there who just through their trash anywhere, out right destroy my place of work with vandalize/graffiti and absolutely destroy the facilities. I think the saddest part of this story is the fact I work for a mountain public park system and that people feel the need to absolutely **** on nature.

(drops mick, steps down from soap box and walks away)
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tessy14

Sun 09/25/16 11:10 PM

yes. sometimes its better to just take it to urself..
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tessy14

Sun 09/25/16 11:12 PM

Every day I pretend to be happy because I have to greet customers at my job while answering their questions and then clean up after them when they leave. It always amazes me how many truly hateful people there are out there who just through their trash anywhere, out right destroy my place of work with vandalize/graffiti and absolutely destroy the facilities. I think the saddest part of this story is the fact I work for a mountain public park system and that people feel the need to absolutely **** on nature.

(drops mick, steps down from soap box and walks away)

awww. thats so sad!
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tessy14

Sun 09/25/16 11:15 PM

I do it all the time. If I believe it, I can achieve it, so no matter what's going on behind the scenes, I usually appear to be in a pretty good mood. My hateful cat, though, he gets to hear it ALL, LOL

lol. i pity for your ***** cat. :joy:
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tessy14

Sun 09/25/16 11:19 PM

Choosing to be happy in adverse situations can give you strength to make further choices to create future happiness.

You are the creator of the way you experience life.

Enjoy the frustrations of learning how:upside_down:

this enlightens me. thanks!