CON - at 18 they might hit you back

or just decide they hate your f*****g guts and never talk to ya again...

psychology? that is the old school of thought. Times have changed. At one point you were not even allowed to spank your kids. Recent studies have shown that spanking does not harm them when done right. Its when its done in an abusive way that problems occur. When its done when you are enraged is when problems occur. for every study that says spanking is bad there is another one that says it is good. it really depends on the child. all in all spanking should only be reserved for the most defiant behavior. for instance how do you discipline a child who ignores all commands you give. such as goto your room. your grounded for the day or week. no tv, no phone. more or less they tell you they do not have to listen to you? what non violent technique would you use then? at some point physical confrontation will come up.

Another PRO. Well done.

how many teenagers actually think their parents know what they are doing. most of them think their parents are clueless. its only later in life we realize how much knowledge they did have. at least most of the time. I know there are some people who should never of had kids but that is another topic.

Right, I totally agree.

My 3yr old grandchild yesterday, Was excellent! So I told my daughter to take her out.

1. Go get her a balloon
2. Go to hastings and get a moive
3. Go to the park
4. Go and get her a treat (ice cream)

here is what happend, My daughter and her husband took there child to drop off the tapes, then to the park, off to the balloon place to pick one out.

lets say this, by the time they got to the balloon place she was so hyped up she was touching things, put a balloon in her mouth, then put some other toy she found in her mouth, her mother and father, Took her out of the store but finished getting treats. However she did not get any at all. And came home.

Who's fault was it, the parents or the 3 yr old child?

Never take a child to the park first! the child will get so hyped up and now you want to take her into a store where after 20min running around just went on.. NO>.. not going to happen.

So The parents got the child in trouble because of there decisions they chose to make!

The child lost out on ice cream because the parents did not listen or follow the advice that was given.

How to make the child feel she can control herself, and let her have a second chance to prove she can behave out in plublic.

1. The next day take child to The balloon shop! let her pick out the one she likes.
2. Take the child to go an pick out a movie for the night. If the child at this time still is in good behaivor. Then #3 is applyed
3. Take the child to the park and let them have fun.
4. Reward your child for her manners, respect and for self control at the same time make it a family treat so she dose not belive she is getting a reward every time she dose something?
5. Before she goes to sleep. (ps ice cream is a sleeping agent) Tell the child how proud you are of her that she was responisbule to behave so well today and next week she can pick a new color.

Once you teach your child to behave then and only then will your child do this. As long as you act proper in plublic around her.... Hint hint.. she will always do it also.

As for the punishment to the crime/ or situation.

If a child at 2 yrs old breakes a glass, whos falt is it the child or the parent.. parent, Why did you give a 2 yr old a glass.. ever here of plastic.
If you tell your 7 yr old to go and rake the grass and leaves, if you think they will not jump and play in that your wrong! there kids. Wrong chore for this age. See the point.

dont set a child up to Fail!

My grandchild runs a childcare center, she dose it all, from cooking the meals, to cleaning up the toys, even teaching the kids respect and manners, sign laungages, forein launages, you name it she dose it. She teaches them to behave! To make there beds and put them away after the nape time!..

What we teach a child is what a child will learn.
---------------------------------------------------------------

I have enjoyed reading all of this and I can say this, YOU are all Right! your answers are just wonderful! and that I thank you all for coming together to talk about all of this for it is very important. Dhs will run your life if you let it. I know they run mine!

Is spanking important! Depends on the family, cultural and ethnics. Not to say Races but did you know that Blacks are allowed and expected to spank but whites, Asian, and Mexicans are not allowed too however American Indians are! It is what society expects.

Did you know that Whites are expected to baby there children and Asian are also so it is expected we are the only ones that breast feed??????? that is not a joke?????????

The image of are society needs to change. Please keep talking and really talk about his find out what is best for the child.

spanking.. or redirecting???? is it the parent or the child?

I'm living proof that some children earn their beatings

my dad wore out so many belts on my arse that he had to start wearing suspenders

That was cute, very cute!

I can say you have a great personality, I have read a lot of your comments... Keep them coming... We all enjoy them!

belts, razor straps, gun butts, his hand... anything my old man could get his hand on he used on us..
Why would anyone want to hit their kids? I raised 3 boys, never touched any of them, they great, polite awesome gentlemen today.

once in high school

I signed up for the "C" choir

that is choir for non singers


the choir director alway left us in the room unattended (his own fault right?) one day my friend and I got a little carried away throwing erasers at each other. I threw one at him and he ducked. Just as the choir director opened the door.

Hitting him with the eraser wasnt so bad. But it was the white chalk mark on his bald head that set everyone in the class off laughing

I got licks that day at school AND at home

yea, they could spank us in school back then..

they still do in West Texas

and my dad still does

but he can't catch me anymore cause he's 72

Really? I did not know that...
Figured by now it would be illegal everywhere...
I have to say I'm glad where my boys went to school they couldn't do that, mama bear would have went into protective mode.

A spanking is just that... a controlled action, taken over the lap, of ideally the father, with a thin harmless paddle, given to a younger child that has been continuously defiant after many verbal warnings, and serious consequences.
In my opinion, the father should be the figure of authority, and really should only have to spank once in a long while to remind the child who is boss and is responsible for their well being. The mother is for love, comfort, and understanding.

"Spare the rod, spoil the child" can exist.. but every child is different as other posters have stated. I have 3 children. All grown. The oldest needed very few "spankings", the middle child needed more, the last child got ONE and never needed another. Sometimes there's just not enough going on in a child's life to take away something everytime a punishment needs to be put in place. However older children and teenagers usually do. Right about the time they become too old for a spanking.

This "rod" spoken of however, may not be an actual rod in order to beat a child with. I have found that when God punishes me, He can't hit me with anything from where He is....but life's consequences for what I've done.

I got more whippings from my mom than from my dad

dad was for when it was really bad. Mom was for just day to day whippings.

she would hand me a kitchen knife and send me out to the yard to cut a switch off the peach tree. and that way by the time I came back in she wasn't mad any more

some years we nearly didn't have any peaches

That's actually super funny there with the peach tree.. lol
I think either you were one of the worst, bothersome, defiant kids in the U.S. or Momma was using hitting for everything. Not necessary in my book.

you've been talking to my mom havent you

ROFLMAO!!!!!

ps... and lookie now... you're "Quietman" LOL parents? smack away!