Well, that's not very helpful.
I'm sorry I can't be more help. When I find myself in a place I need to find my way out of I usually just follow my gut instincts and start moving. Or make a map. Follow the yellow brick road. It's never failed me yet.
This is basically what I do as well. My instincts were to retreat to a safe place. Then start over again with the aid of a map and spirit guides I can trust. Then I have a yellow brick road to follow as Ruth suggests, plus I have spirit guides walking along with me illuminating the way.
It takes time and patience to build such a map. I've been working on my map for a few years now, but I've made phenomenal progress in that area. In fact, I'm doing so well with the map construction, I'm almost just content to sit here and look at the map.
But alas, I'm preparing to start out on a journey once again in the very near future as I now have a paradigm I can work with.
This is my crew:
It took me a long time to even realize precisely what was required. And then longer yet to select the archetypes that work well for me. But I've learned so much in the process. Getting to know the archetypes and how they fit into the larger picture is important. The levels of consciousness are deep and therefore require all of these various archetypes if you're going to truly find your way around.
Of course, the "gang" I put together here is what I have personally been drawn to. The exact members of the archetype is not so important. However, their roles with respect to the cosmic conscious is somewhat important. Elementals are different from divine consciousnesses, (you might think of them as the workers who do the actual work of manifestation for the divine consciousnesses). The archetypal messagers used for communiqué with the divine consciousnesses are also important. I perfer to work with three types; hermaphrodites, yin, and yang. But I suppose a single communiqué archetype could also suffice for many people. I have my own reasons for using a three-gender scheme.
In addition to the above Archetypal map I also use the orientation map shown below:
This Qabalah Tree helps me to navigate from one consciousness to the next and helps to bring them into alignment when working in harmony toward a specific higher goal.
By using this paradigm I am never lost, or without spirit guides that I know and trust. Getting to know the spirit guides is of paramount importance. If you just travel into the world of consciousness on your own without asking for guidance or setting a specific desired destination. You're bound to get lost and confused. It's a complex world.
In fact, from what I've read, there are infinite 'trees within trees' kind of like the Mandelbrot set. Although, the good news is that they are indeed fractals. So once you've gotten a good handle on one Qabalah, you're in great shape to navigate just about any level of it imaginable.
Anyway, I thought I'd just share what I'm doing. I'm well aware that my paradigm and use of a Qabalah tree with Tarot pathways is only one possible model. There are many other models to choose from. It's just so much easier if you have a good map (and spirit allies) before you dive into the depths of consciousness with no real destination in mind.
At least that's my thoughts for whatever they're worth.
