I hate when it rains, cause in puddles I encounter this guy
Unable to give a rebuttal but swift as the pain flood his eyes
Wonderin why he's a gift with no purpose
A priceless one-of-a-kind piece that's worthless
Grounded with no surface
And when he shows one, it's a facade
Cause inside he fights feelings that he was mistake by God
I see his confusion and self-deception
Questions of relevance and intelligence
He holds an illusion of self-acceptance
That he shows to those outside lookin in
He's outside lookin in to his own life; lookin for strength
To carry on as a pawn in this chess game of existance
In his mind he wants to go on to the dawn
And leave the stress that came with existance
Hopin in death he'll find life
Cause as he lives, he roams the dark, tryin to find light
He's made his heart so hard, he doesn't even cry anymore
Cause he's confronted sorrow frequently
His heart's been broken frequently
It's like he's lost some part of him and just haven't found it yet
So in his search, he's left with nothin but questions and regret
All he wants to know is how one day, he's content
And the next day he's cryin
Cause his life isn't what he thought life meant
He just wants to be happy, with his love and all
But too often I get messages through telepathic calls
He's askin me through a puddle what more must he endure to continue
But for some reason he knows he most endure to continue
Shadows have shadows eyedea
I stand alone
Burned every bridge over the troubled water
No longer hiding from my personality disorder
A stronger tide is coming, I've been running
Trying to function fine without my mind
Climbing out this ****ing corner
I was born a thorn away from the rotten petals
A forgotten rebel craft in the absence of heaven's heavy hands
To develop an evident level of benevolence
So it's probably better I sold my soul to the devil
This is a message to anyone I've met that thinks they know me
Don't pretend to understand none of the issues that I'm holding
I was in a rush to grow up, look Mom no cuts
Just a stomach in disgust, and the fear
That I might go nuts this year
If I don't slow up I'll see you one my way
One day this ****'ll kill me but I guess that it's OK
I've lost all faith in a world so full of hate
And I don't ****ing love music I just use it to escape
I'm caught between wanting to punch someone in the face
And putting a bullet in my head to leave the human race
Everything takes its toll but there's no tolls I can take
I haven't yet found a good reason to be awake
Introducing the corroded bones I hide behind my smile
I'm angry at the universe for the way she treats me now
And keeps me down, stealing all my energy
I'm feeling like my enemy, concealing my identity
Not dealing with my tendencies
I peel the skin and then I squeeze
The real imprinted Hanse's disease
Not illing in this century, I'm kneeling to the entity
Who built this penitentiary, as filthy as a centipede
And guiltless in a sense cause he was willing to
Just let me bleed, While I wore a game face
In 10 years don't check for me I'll be in the same place
This planet's just an overpopulated mental hospital
Each zombie walk around constitutes another obstacle
So here it is, I'm finally coming out my shell
All 19 years of my life have been in conflict with myself
I'm insecure about every facet of my existence
From my addictions, to the condition I choose to live in
Who you kidding, I suffer from excess anxiety
A product of pollution in American society
Stare into my eyes and see the hell that burns inside my mind
And I no longer have an ego I can hide behind
But I've been fine disregarding my insanity
Every form of art isolates you from humanity
But it's provoked against being force fed
So **** education for a decade and 3 years
Of headaches from my peers
Cause now I realize I could have learned more on my own
They taught me how to know everything except my soul
Which is everything I need to grow, everything that keeps me whole
Everything that ever meant anything to Eyedea
So I leave with golden hope
To rip the beast that holds my focus
But the fact remains the same, I'm still bound by chains
It doesn't matter if your chain is 10 feet or 100 feet
The fact remains the same, you're still bound by chains
So people say I've changed, and it's harder to relate to me
Good, I never liked you our friendship was make believe
I'm peeling the mask back and revealing the rap that's been
Filling my organs drilling short distorted portions
Of morbid masochistic torture that unfortunately crafted
An interest to orbit my portrait and inflict my image with disorder
The minutes get shorter, walls start to close in
Feels like the brain is hanging on by one clothespin
I've hidden in the darkness for too long
I make it look alright but in the inside its so wrong
I want life to change but I don't know if it can
For a man or machine or whatever the **** I am
I stand alone burned every bridge over the troubled water
No longer hiding from my personality disorder
You want to die my life well come and stay in madness's favorite little corner
Cause even Shadows have Shadows
And my secrets are eating me
Eagerly feeding to scream my dreams away
But they keep on defeating me
(Even shadows have shadows)
Welcome to the filthy subconscious of an actor
Who murdered his childhood to stop the audience's laughter
(Even shadows have shadows)
How am I to break free from my fears
When I don't like what I see
And I can't feel what I hear?
(Even shadows have shadows)
So don't judge my book by it's cover
Cause my story's just as ****ed up as any other!
Edited by
romeoindespair
on Sat 02/15/14 07:11 PM