As someone with four brothers and who had a Father I dearly loved. I tend to be unable to be on the extreme feminist side of debates. I tend to try to walk in the shoes of males and imagine the 'what ifs' and 'how would I feel ifs'

That being said, it is worrying to me that so many men are being targeted for mere 'coercion'. The idea of no equals no, to me, is unrealistic. Its like saying 'til death do us part means til death do us part'

the issue is that the way a person feels in one moment could change in the next. No equals 'not this second'. And so we are 'coerced' all the time. I am offered a dish I have not had before and I say 'no, thank you'. To which the host explains how good it is and 'coerces' me to try some. I can still stand on my no, or I can try it. If I try it, Im a pushover, not a victim of some terrible injustice.

If I am at a park and dont want to go on a ride, and say 'no', but my friends insist it will be fun and I go anyway. Im no victim of 'coercion' Im a pushover.

My point is that extremes in dating are unrealistic, and thank goodness for that. It may not be PC, but part of the excitement for many is the idea of the 'chase' and the 'challenge', most things about dating are some form of 'coercing' another person to feel certain ways for and about you.

Many times our initial 'no'(in any situation) is based upon nervousness or ignorance or some sense of moral obligation, but our ACTIONS are based on the reality of how we feel and what we want.

I am wondering how long before we can start excusing 'adulterous' men because they said 'no' but the female 'coerced' them. Will they become victims who can share the #metoo mantra? Will those women be demonized for not understanding "no equals no"?

I do not count physical force or threat of violence or unemployment as mere 'coercion'. But simple verbal arguments to try to convince are nowhere in the same ball park and part of life.

Do you think being 'coerced' makes one a victim or a pushover?