Topic: No one gets it...
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Imthebestpart's photo

Imthebestpart

Mon 08/06/18 11:00 PM

I'm a single mom of a little one that's on the spectrum. I've found that men don't get that my kiddo has a lot of needs and he comes first. I feel like I go out of my way to accommodate them but they can't accommodate for me and my schedule. It's frustrating to be into someone but know that they'll have to be extremely flexible. A couple have told me that I should wait untimely kiddo is older to date, like I really want to be alone for the next decade. Am I asking too much?
msharmony's photo

msharmony

Mon 08/06/18 11:31 PM


I'm a single mom of a little one that's on the spectrum. I've found that men don't get that my kiddo has a lot of needs and he comes first. I feel like I go out of my way to accommodate them but they can't accommodate for me and my schedule. It's frustrating to be into someone but know that they'll have to be extremely flexible. A couple have told me that I should wait untimely kiddo is older to date, like I really want to be alone for the next decade. Am I asking too much?


I have a nephew on the spectrum as well. His parents are totally devoted to him. I cant imagine what it must be like but Im sure there are those with experience in the area of special children who would not hesitate to build a relationship of some sort, teachers and doctors and others who have raised or were related to special needs children, for example.

Keep the faith. flowerforyou
Robertcrna777's photo

Robertcrna777

Mon 08/06/18 11:37 PM


I'm a single mom of a little one that's on the spectrum. I've found that men don't get that my kiddo has a lot of needs and he comes first. I feel like I go out of my way to accommodate them but they can't accommodate for me and my schedule. It's frustrating to be into someone but know that they'll have to be extremely flexible. A couple have told me that I should wait untimely kiddo is older to date, like I really want to be alone for the next decade. Am I asking too much?


So I don’t normally give serious answers on here, however..... from what I’ve seen from men and people in general a lot are either emotionally immature, selfish, unrealistic expectations, plain ignorant or a combination of one or more of these. It’s very very very hard to find someone who is selfless and willing to put you and your child first before themselves. Is it possible to find the right guy...., yes they are out there.... is it likely you will????? Sometimes it’s simply better to be alone and happy. I wish you the best of luck!
Edited by Robertcrna777 on Mon 08/06/18 11:38 PM
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greeneyes148

Tue 08/07/18 07:26 AM

To tell you the absolute truth I would not want to bother with a woman that did not put her children first before our relationship.

I had taken a woman out to a early dinner once and during the dinner she told me that it was her sons ( 12 years old) birthday. And I asked her " then what are you doing here with me". I did not want to see her anymore. For me it is a red flag.

kids come first.. always.
ChrisRose86's photo

ChrisRose86

Sun 08/12/18 04:46 AM

Little ones always come first. On the spectrum or not. Don't force a guy to understand. Hold out for the guy that does understand. It will be worth the wait.
TxsGal3333's photo

TxsGal3333

Sun 08/12/18 06:31 AM

Aww hon being a single mom of a two from the time they were 7 & 9 believe me there are those men out, there that if they care for you enough they will work their schedules around your child and love them just as much..

Explain to them what Spectrum is, some I'm sure have no clue...

Myself the guys I have meet that did not go around their kids much even after I tried to get them too I left in the dust... Kids should always be your number one priority they are only little once...

Keep doing what your doing never know when you might run into that one special one that is willing to go that extra mile...:thumbsup:

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TMommy

Sun 08/12/18 09:11 AM

m son is on the spectrum
I figured this out back when he was a little guy
I have not had him tested…on purpose
my call as his mother but I did not want him to be labeled
so ..I divorced his dad when he was twelve
and then went back to school
he is now seventeen and we have worked on
understanding facial expressions, sarcasm, humor
how to deal with things without having a melt down
when his schedule changes
he has come a long way
but…no I have not dated

um I went on a few first dates that first year after my divorce
but there are some needy SOB's out there
and my time and energy went to my son and to obtaining my college degree


that was my choice and I am not sorry I made it