This past year has seen many high profile stories about women being harassed or assaulted. The standards by which innocence or guilt are assigned have been very subjective, to say the least.

The most troubling thing may be the difficulty in which women find ourselves by on one hand being 'equal' to men, but on the other being so easily victimized by them. Women are now just as likely to engage in casual sexual encounters with virtual strangers as men. Women are now just as likely to be into alternative or 'kinky' activities as men. Women are now just as likely as anyone else to fabricate or expand on the truth for their moment in the spotlight. And men still pretty much are more likely to be calling the shots and making the final decisions about whether to listen to women and their charges.

So in a crime, where the foundation is the non tangible concept of 'consent', what kind of tangible evidence can there ever be to prove the presence or absence of it?

There really may not be any 'common sense' demeanor between the opposite sexes because every person may not be turned on by the same thing and trial and error and COMMUNICATION are the only way to really know from person to person.

One woman may be flattered by whistles and pet names, or turned on by being groped or manhandled, while another may be terrified or disgusted by it. But none of us, including men, are mind readers, so we go by trial and error.

There is a spontaneity to intimacy that I would hate to see lost to a mandatory protocol for establishing consent, yet there is also too much of an ease for people to get away with serious intimidation or abuse under the guise of 'sex', as long as they don't go over into ripping clothes or leaving bruises.

Can we teach better communication skills, and more of an expectation of communication in intimate situations? Would it help maybe if there were some 'cues' to intentionally look for to signal participation and consent of the other person, before things go too far?

I feel like mutual petting, for example, might be one obvious one, for instance. But people would then, even in casual encounters, be required to actually PAY ATTENTION to the other person and not just be in it for their own satisfaction, which is hard once one IS actually in a state of feeling satisfied.

I dont know. I just feel like there are people trying to make change with the #MeToo movement, but I dont want to see it used to persecute every 'little' thing done by men. I do wonder if there will ever be a more accurate and fair method and system of determining who has crossed those lines of assault or harassment, and who have just been guilty of trial and error attempts with no intention of harm.


... RANT OVER. lol