When I was married I asked my wife

"What's the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?"

She said she had no idea so I told her

I said "About 40 pounds"

Then she said to me

"Oh yeah what's the difference between a husband and a boyfriend?"

I thought but nothing came to mind

So she said "About 40 minutes"

You are funny and can see that myself, can we have a chat if you don't mind

Wow, how did this get here? I had no idea