i give up......why did my wife leave after 22 years
no warning just goodbye
No one leaves just like that. If you feel you didn't get a warning you just weren't paying attention to the state of your relationship.
People ALWAYS show signs of dissatisfaction, not being happy anymore, not being fulfilled. They usually even voice this which you as a man will likely call "complaining" while she was letting you know how she felt.
I can never understand how men can say "she just left out of the blue! Everything was fine and she just left!"
If everything was fine she wouldn't have left.
Pay heed.
Learn from this. The message is simple: never take someone else and a relationship for granted.
Being in a relationship/married doesn't guarantee it will last forever, nor does it mean you can stop making an effort and stop investing in the other and the connection.
Good question to ask would be: "Where did I fall short?"
Not to feel guilty but to learn, and with that recover.
i cant even figure out if was a warning signs, trust me, i have analyzed it so much, she seemed happy, she asked me to take her on vacation in May to Tennesse I did, she had found place online, I tried to do everything to make her happy, we had a vacation to Myrtle beach planned for September, but left first week of July, and I didnt go alone.
we talked nearly every day and night, I always asked if was ok, how she felt, if needed anything, so I could help anytime, I thought i was pretty intune to her.
the only thing i know of was the fuss for me to buy that sorry Liberal kid a house, and during 1 fuss, she saw my eyes, started asking if I was going to kill her, i said NO! but she got spooked over look in my eyes. she knew in my younger days I enjoyed hurting people that crossed me, i never started, but I would beat person, even today, try hitting me, & that person will change from attacker into the victim, the only thing else, is she knows I refused to give her Liberal daughter anything, as well as her grandson, my will gave it to my deceased best friends son, that is respectful of people.
her grandson was around during TN trip, fussing because will lose his insurance when turns 18, he needs medicine, like Insulin, what is he going to do, i said GET A JOB! preferably one with insurance!, he was mad enough to fight, he did cuss me, but he wants all handed to him, he wasnt conceived when i met ex, 2 years ago, I tried to give him money, i had saved all my spare coins from time was 6 months old, to 15, several thousand dollars, so he could buy first car, he cussed me out, he only wanted electric car, or Hybrid, refused to roll money, demanded i take to bank, then I could put money in his account, and he could buy what he wanted, electronic games. needles to say I rolled coins up, we used, part was used on TN trip. my ex ended up buying her daughter a Camry Hybrid so could have transportation, and not rely on public transportation, yeah, so my ex made down payment, made monthly payments, paid insurance, gas, and all expenses. for someone that refuses to work. kid has done a few food deliveries if wanted something, like a game, but no, relied on my ex paying her way
when the daughter started asking for a way out from her BF, that got into porn, i offered to help rent her an appartment, let her move here to 1 of my homes, or pull in trailer and put in well septic at a 1 acre piece of land i own, that wasnt acceptable, only her own home, in 1 of 3 nearby cities to her, everything I was shown was $50k to $100k i told her to get a job, i would help if needed a hand, but i wasnt going to pay for it.
so at age 67, my ex was going to retire October or November, this year, now has to work many more years, starting over. i been told has been posting anti-liberal stuff on facebook now, i was blocked, but we had over 100 mutual friends, so i hear of what is posted, and sometimes get screen shots. before she left, she never posted political stuff. I never said I dont believe in helping, i dont believe in giving to someone that refuses to work. I want a $30K car, sure... i want a $100K house.... go work for it, if fall short 1-2 months ask, but get a job and work, try.
and here I am... no regrets on not buying a home, & I was going to buy my ex a home at lake 2 years ago, realtor jerked us around during height of COVID, refused to accept deposit, depending on bank financing, only accepting cash offers, i applied at bank, but place was sold within a few days. i was still working second job then, making decent money.