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Community > Parenting Talk
Topic: Funny how women run when they find out I have my child.
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karen's photo

karen

Sun 02/23/20 05:42 PM

I have a 10 and 11 yr old at home still and I always have the same drama. The men that contact me dont want the kids involved. sorry, it's a package deal.
IamAyhen's photo

IamAyhen

Thu 04/09/20 02:27 AM

Most women feel the same way too, especially when men are single.
Firefly's photo

Firefly

Fri 04/10/20 10:13 AM

I'm a single mom of 2 girls. I love it when a guy already has kids. I unfortunately had to have a hysterectomy so I can't have any more but I love children and I usually run when they don't have any because they might want some and leave me later on. I actually am more likely to date someone that has kids, they understand that my kids are the priority until they are grown. That doesn't mean that the man in my life would not be important or special.
ivegotthegirth's photo

ivegotthegirth

Sat 04/11/20 03:51 AM

Hi Firefiy, glad to see another Nebraskan here willing to post!
I have seen a lot of what you're talking about. Myself I have one child only, a 15 y/o daughter so that doesn't seem to spook women smokin
notbeold's photo

notbeold

Sat 04/11/20 04:59 AM

There was another guy on here a couple of years ago with the same problem.

Maybe the women you like only want to have their own kids, and not want to help raise someone else's.
no photo

Mhel34

Wed 04/29/20 09:47 AM

Thats the reality,sometimes being single parent is hard in some ways but its doesn't matter right?The important is,u take good care of ur kid and as for trying to find someone to stay with u and if u find that one is just a plus.Goodluck:blush:

(I'm a single parent too and it doesn't bother me without a partner)
Gloryn's photo

Gloryn

Thu 05/07/20 12:53 AM

I'm my experience those type of women have no heart, no compassion, and no experience in family. I think is also hard for single mother as well. Especially mothers that where in an abusive relationship their wall are very hard to break down, but I think time it will heal not just yours but them too. They just need to learn how to love not just you but the people that are important to you.
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Unknow

Sun 07/05/20 03:43 AM

Your child revelation is filtering out incompatible woman. They are the ones not for you, but one or more will invariably come along perhaps with children and it will be a delightful match. Time is your biggest stress....where is she? And your biggest assett...she is not the one.
Faeric's photo

Faeric

Thu 08/27/20 09:23 PM


may be telling them he's adopted and doesn't know

(with the kid's permission)


Lying to a woman like this is NEVER a good idea... When she finds out the truth, it will break the trust and she will question everything else you have told her
feelyoungagain's photo

feelyoungagain

Wed 09/02/20 05:55 PM


I'm starting to believe the women I meet tend to be shallow minded when the find out I have my eleven year old son. Do they think I wouldn't have time for them? Even women with children would rather have a man who does not have custody of their children. In my experience I find that women with multiple children find dates way easier than men with children.

I do however realize women my age have children already grown and do not want young children around anymore. Only my friends know I have a loving child and anyone I meet never really get to know my child, that seems sad but thats how it is these days.

Three years with having my child on my own has taught me to not trust women. I wonder what the next three years will teach me?


I'm not shallow. I just don't like kids. Let those women go. Why invest your time with someone who is not a match? Process of elimination. Done! Next.. Don't take it personally either. Everyone has preferences, including you. No biggie, just frustrating.
feelyoungagain's photo

feelyoungagain

Wed 09/02/20 05:57 PM


I have a 10 and 11 yr old at home still and I always have the same drama. The men that contact me dont want the kids involved. sorry, it's a package deal.


So... what's the problem? I can't even believe they're wasting their own time LOL They're decision-making abilities is not your problem. Sure it's frustrating, but clearly he's not the one for you. Moving on.. Don't apologize for having kids. It's part of you beautiful package deal. Those men... Meh... forget about 'em.
feelyoungagain's photo

feelyoungagain

Wed 09/02/20 06:02 PM


I'm a single mom of 2 girls. I love it when a guy already has kids. I unfortunately had to have a hysterectomy so I can't have any more but I love children and I usually run when they don't have any because they might want some and leave me later on. I actually am more likely to date someone that has kids, they understand that my kids are the priority until they are grown. That doesn't mean that the man in my life would not be important or special.


I wouldn't run because what if they are fine with not having more kids. Two may suit them just fine. Then again, if a man is going to leave you for that, let him walk away. You don't deserve that kind of man. Besides, have that talk. You might be pleasantly surprised and start a romance that you deserve. I don't have kids and don't want any. My point is that even a woman without kids, like a man without kids, does not mean he/she cannot understand that your children are important, special, and always your top priority. Open your mind :)
feelyoungagain's photo

feelyoungagain

Wed 09/02/20 06:03 PM


Hi Firefiy, glad to see another Nebraskan here willing to post!
I have seen a lot of what you're talking about. Myself I have one child only, a 15 y/o daughter so that doesn't seem to spook women smokin


I think age has a lot to do with it. If a man has children, I want them to be adult children. I don't like kids and don't want them.
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Unknow

Thu 10/01/20 05:39 AM

To be honest some women are very single minded. I have 4 children and not would I blink an eye if I dated a guy who had children. Actually I take my hat off to anyone whom is parenting alone. So get out there be proud of you and you're children. Don't let ppl put you down. Good luck :hugging:️:hugging:️
Katia Serena 's photo

Katia Serena

Sun 10/25/20 09:52 PM

I have to say it's commendable that you have your child with you and any woman should respect that. From my experience it is generally easier for a man with children to date and start a relationship because 9 times out of 10 the children are with the mom. My most recent relationship which just ended actually is a prime example. Although his kids are older now when his children were younger he never really cared about having his daughters with him. He just jumped from one woman to another and kind of dragged his children from a distance through it. From the onset i knew that he was a very possessive man that wanted all my time. Put a child first and God will send the right woman along your way.






Electron's photo

Electron

Mon 11/02/20 03:16 AM

I have a 7 y/o son who I have been the primary care giver for since year 0. The only upside I could think of in my current situation is that, if I could find some one new to be with, that maybe he would wind up with some brothers or sisters and that would be awesome. I guess I never considered the idea that having a son will be a road block to having a new relationship .. and thats kinda sad.
Dea's photo

Dea

Thu 11/05/20 05:02 AM

The next time you go on a date better tell her that you are living with your kid from day one. So that if she's not fine with it, no money and time will be waisted. You deserve someone better.
Jenny1's photo

Jenny1

Fri 11/06/20 02:44 PM

I think you need to think about what you have written. Because it my be you and not your child that is putting someone off. Women are not the problem??
cleve's photo

cleve

Fri 11/06/20 03:51 PM

ITS A LOT TO ASK A MAN OR WOMAN TO ENTER A RELATIONSHIP WITH ANOTHER WHO HAS KIDS. ITS REALLY HARD TO MAINTAIN A RELATIONSHIP WITH ONE PERSON. EACH ONE HAS THERE OWN FAVORITE FEELINGS AND VIEW OF REALITY. IN TODAYS WORLD LISTENING TO OTHERS IS A LOST SKILL.I NOTICE IN ALMOST ALL CASES WHEN I SHARE SOMETHING MOST PEOPLE THEY WILL SEE THE SENSE I AM SAYING MAKES TO THEMSELVES..WHEN WE SEE THE SENSE ANOTHER PERSON IS MAKING TO THEMSELVES AND HOW THERE MIND WORKS WE GET TO KNOW THEM, A CONNECTION IS MADE. TO HAVE A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP WE MUST GOOD LISTENING SKILLS. CHECK OUT " imago dialog ".its a connective process has only 3 parts to it, and anyone can learn.....
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Veronica Adele

Fri 03/05/21 05:24 PM

:thumbsup: