An You just assume V laughter a loud

Too bad

This place seems like fun. I should use this app more.

A Cop stops a driver for swerving in and out of lanes on the highway. He directs the man to blow into a breathalyzer.

Man:  “I’m afraid I can’t do that, officer.”

Cop: “What’s the harm?” ‍♀️

Man:  “Because I have asthma. If I blow into that tube, I might have an asthma attack.”

Cop: “All right, we’ll just get a urine sample at the station.”‍♀️

Man:  “I can’t do that, officer.”

Cop: “What’s the harm?”‍♀️

Man:  “Because I have diabetes. If I pee in a cup, I might get low blood sugar.”

Cop: “All right, we’ll take a blood sample.” ‍♀️

Man:  “I can’t do that, officer.”

Cop: “What’s the harm?” ‍♀️

Man:  “Because I have hemophilia. I could die if I give blood.”

Cop: “All right, just walk this white line.”‍♀️

Man:  “I can’t do that, officer.”

Cop: “What’s the harm?” ‍♀️

Man:  “Because I’m drunk.” 🥴

KeepSmiling

That was a good one!

when I tell her i am 17 they block me.When I tell him i am 19 they reply.
you face it

What is red and has 7 dents? Snow Whites cherry.

I've been reminded of another meaning of cherry, i.e. h---n.

That's a good one,

I saw a customer where a t-shirt that reads as follows:
I’m a multitasker: I can listen, ignore and forget all at the same time.

LOL

LOL

Wow

🤣🤣🤣🤣

I told her I needed a Phillips screwdriver, and she went to the fridge. I was so surprised when she poured a glass of orange juice. Then she went to the bar, put in a double shot of vodka, and gave me the glass. I looked down, and it said Phillip on it. She said it was her dad's name too, and she had no clue you could fix things with drinks.