Funny Apple .

My future wife ‍🦰 and I had scheduled an appointment with her parents (3 days before our wedding). Arrived there, I found her sister ‍🦳 (very pretty) in a mini skirt🩲 exposing all her shapes🤨. She told me to come in that her sister would be there in 2 hours...
I accepted then I entered. After 5 min, she came close to me and made me understand that she is crāzy about me and wants me to slēēp with her before her sister arrives (carēssing me) 🥰. I didn't say anything! She got up to go to her room, she said to me: if you want, jøin me in my room . I didn't say anything either and got up to go outside. As I tried to open my car door‍♂️, I saw all my in-laws coming downstairs applauding and showing congratulations for this test that I just passed. My future wife brēāks down in tēārs 🥺🥺 because she has seen with her own eyes how many times I love her and I am faithful to her. I myself couldn't help myself . I BrøKe down in tēārs too because this is the first time that a cøndøm has saved me. By the way, I was going to get my cøndøms in my car🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣...

A father and son moved into a new house. One day, the father saw the son was looking oddly pale.

“What’s wrong, son?” he asked.

“Dad, do you believe in gh0sts?” the son asked.

“Of course not,” said the father. “Gh0sts don’t exist.”

“But Dad,” the son replied, “our maid said that there is a gh0st in this house.”

“Son, pack your bags. We’re leaving,” the father said.

“Why, Dad?” the son asked.

The father replied, “We don’t have a maid!”

Happy sunday

Funny Apple .

FUNNY

Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family
ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in
financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull so that they can breed their own stock.

Upon leaving with $600, the brunette tells her sister, 'When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home'.

The brunette arrives at the man's ranch, inspects the
bull, and decides she wants to buy it. The man tells her that he will sell it for $599, no less.

After paying him, she drives to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news.

She walks into the telegraph office, and says, 'I want
to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out there so we can haul it home.'

The telegraph operator explains that he'll be glad to
help her, then adds, it will cost 99 cents a word.

Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette realizes that she'll only be able to send her sister one word.

After a few minutes of thinking, she nods and says, 'I
want you to send her the word 'comfortable.'

The operator shakes his head.
'How is she ever going to know that you want her to
hitch the trailer to your pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her just the word 'comfortable?'

The brunette explains, 'My sister's blonde. The word is big.
She'll read it very slowly.."com-for-da-bul".

Funny Apple .

War
A Dutchman in Amsterdam felt that he needed to confess, so he went to his Priest.

“Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. During WWII, I hid a Jewish man in my attic.”

“Well,” answered the Priest, “That's not a sin.”

“But I made him pay me 20 gulden for each week he stayed.” The Dutchman said.

The Priest replied, “I admit that wasn't good, but you did it for a good cause.”

The Dutchman exclaimed “Oh thank you Father; that eases my mind. Father, I have one more question.”

“What is it son?” ask the priest.

The Dutchman whispered “Do I have to tell him the war is over?”

Funny Apple .

one of my funniest joke ive read too lol

A graduate was finding difficulties in finding a job.
He saw an advert in one of the newspapers for a job at a zoo.
At the interview, the manager told him that their only Gorilla which has been a tourist attraction for many years died so they needed someone to dress and disguise as a gorilla since they haven't been able to find a new gorilla.
The graduate was embarrassed but since the salary was good and attractive, he accepted the job.On the first day, he put on gorilla skin, entered the cage , started jumping and beating his chest while roaring like a gorilla.

The next day , he put on gorilla skin again , started moving around the zoo and mistakenly entered another cage until he found himself staring at a Lion. The lion roared and started moving towards him.
The graduate forgot that he was a gorilla and started shouting like a human " help please help me "
The lion leaped onto him and knocked him to the ground and whispered into one of his ears." Benjamin! Benja, its me George your College mate . No fear bro, there's no job in this country . infact , you see that Crocodile by the water? That's Michael our class prefect . Relax bro , hustle is hustle as long as we're putting food on the table.

note:,jobs in the zoo still open

FUNNY

It's the same zoo named Mingle2...
hope no one recognise Munglu

Funny Apple .

🤣DON'T READ IF U HATE TO LAUGH
A man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will tell everyone how smart and brave you are and how you are my hero" The man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will be your loving companion for an entire week." The man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for a year and do ANYTHING you want." Again the man took the frog out, smiled at it, and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a year and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The man said, "Look, I'm a computer programmer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is cool."
🤣🤣🤣

ctto

Funny Apple

FUNNY

No I Didn't Read..

I'm only Composted Poor-Grammar

My wife asked me to hand her the chapstick and I accidentally handed her a gluestick, she still isn't talking to me.

haha,thats funny IU

Happiness comes only for short period, enjoy it...

Funny IU .